If you’re struggling with a loss of libido you’re not alone in this struggle. In fact, a whopping 40-70% of women deal with a disappearing sex drive at some point in their lives. It’s like trying to start a car with a dead battery – frustrating and definitely not the joy ride you had in mind, so lets dive in what causes low libido.
But before we get into the nitty-gritty, let’s bust some myths. Low libido isn’t just a “woman thing” – it can affect anyone, regardless of age or gender. And while it’s tempting to blame it all on hormones (like, menopause!), the truth is that there are tons of factors that can tank your desire.
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Key Takeaways
- Low libido in women is probably more common than you think – up to 70% of females experience low libido at some point.
- Stress and anxiety can kill your sex drive faster than you can say “not tonight, honey.”. Also, diabetes to depression, certain health conditions can make your libido go MIA.
- Your lifestyle choices (think: low sleep, too much booze, unhealthy eats) can also put damper on your desire.
- Birth control and other meds might be great at their job, but they can also mess with your mojo. Not to mention hormone changes during pregnancy, breastfeeding, and menopause can lower libido.
- Relationship issues like poor communication or constant fighting can suck the sizzle right out of your sex life.
Libido 101: What’s Normal, What’s Not?
First things first: what exactly is low libido? Simply put, it’s when your interest in getting frisky takes a nosedive. But here’s the thing – everyone’s “normal” is different. What feels like a sexual drought to one person might be fine for someone else.
That said, if you consistently feel unmotivated and this is causing you stress or relationship issues, it might be time to investigate deeper. While occasional dips in desire are regular, chronically low libido can be a sign that something’s off.
And guess what? Low libido doesn’t discriminate. While it tends to affect women more often (thanks to hormones), men can experience it, too. The difference is that it’s frequently a combination of physical and emotional factors for ladies, while it’s usually more straightforward for dudes.
So if you’re feeling less than frisky on the regular, don’t panic – you’re not some weird sex-hating unicorn. Tons of other women are right there with you, wondering where the heck their libido went and how to get it back.
Understanding What Causes Low Libido for Women
Alright, now that we’ve got the basics down, let’s talk about what might be killing your sex drive softly. There are many possible reasons, from physical health issues to lifestyle factors to relationship probs. Let’s break it down:
Stress is a Mood Killer
Surprise, surprise – when you’re stressed, getting busy is probably the last thing on your mind. But it’s not just in your head. When you’re constantly anxious or overwhelmed, your body pumps out cortisol (aka the stress hormone), which will likely dampen your sexual desire. Plus, stress can manifest physically, like fatigue or headaches.
Your Body Might Be Trying to Tell You Something
Certain health conditions can take a toll on sex drive in women or men. We’re talking diabetes, thyroid problems, depression…the list goes on. If your libido has gone AWOL and you can’t figure out why, it might be time to chat with your doctor and get some lab work done.
Lifestyle Choices Matter
How you treat your body daily can affect what goes down in the bedroom. Are you burning the midnight oil and skimping on sleep? Hitting the booze too hard? Eating like crap? All of these things can mess with your physical and mental health, which in turn can tank your libido.
Is It Your Birth Control?
Hormonal birth control is excellent for preventing unplanned pregnancies, but it can also be a buzzkill for your sex drive. The same goes for other meds like antidepressants (explore antidepressants that do not affect libido). If you suspect your script might be to blame for your missing mojo, talk to your doctor about other options.
Blame It On the Hormones
Hormones can do a number on your libido, especially during significant life changes like pregnancy, breastfeeding, and menopause. When your estrogen, testosterone, and progesterone levels are all out of whack, it’s no wonder you’d rather watch TV than get down and dirty.
Is Your Relationship on the Fritz?
Last but not least, the state of your relationship can play a huge role in your sex drive. It can be hard to get in the mood if you and your partner are constantly butting heads, not communicating, or just not feeling the love.
On the flip side, feeling safe, secure, and connected with your S.O. can do wonders for your libido. So, if your relationship has been feeling meh lately, it might be time for some real talk (and maybe even couples therapy).
Getting Your Groove Back: What to Do About Low Libido
Okay, so now that we know what might be causing your libido to go MIA, let’s talk about what you can do about it. Because life’s too short for mediocre sex, am I?
Getting The Help You Need
First and foremost, if you’re struggling with low libido, find help. We do offer masterclasses to help you!
Also, consider talking to a doctor if you feel it’s a medical issue. They can help you determine an underlying health issue and recommend the best action. If your doctor suspects hormones might be the issue, they may refer you to a specialist like a urologist or endocrinologist. These folks are trained to sniff out any imbalances and get you back on track.
Shake Up Your Routine
Sometimes, all it takes to reignite the spark is a little lifestyle overhaul. And no, I’m not talking about going on some crazy fad diet or signing up for a marathon (unless that’s your thing, in which case, go you!).
Small changes can make a big difference when it comes to your libido. Try incorporating moderate exercise into your daily routine – it can boost your mood, help you lose weight, and even improve hormone production. Just don’t go overboard, or you might end up too pooped to party (if you know what I mean).
You are what you eat, so fueling your body with healthy, whole foods can also do wonders for your sex drive. Plus, losing even a small amount of weight can help rev up your engine and make you feel like a total smoke show.
And if you’re hitting the bottle too hard, it might be time to cut back. Alcohol can seriously dampen your libido (not to mention other essential body functions). So stick to moderation, and your lady bits will thank you.
Get Your Relationship Back on Track
If relationship issues are killing your sex drive softly, it’s time to take action. Start by having an honest convo with your partner about what’s going on. I know, I know – talking about sex can be awkward. But it’s so important to get back on the same page.
If you’re not sure how to broach the subject, consider enlisting the help of a couples therapist or sex coach. They can give you the tools to communicate better, work through any roadblocks, and reignite that spark.
And don’t forget about the power of self-love! Taking some time to connect with your own body and figure out what turns you on can do wonders for your sex drive (and your relationship). So go ahead and treat yourself to some solo play – your libido will thank you.
The Bottom Line
Low libido is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s an everyday struggle that can happen to anyone for many reasons. The key is to not suffer in silence or accept a lackluster sex life.
If you’re regularly feeling less than frisky, again, check out our Masterclass. We look to help you get to the root of issues. In the meantime, focus on caring for yourself—mind, body, and soul. Eat well, move your booty, get enough sleep, and don’t be afraid to prioritize some self-love (wink, wink).
And if relationship woes are dragging down your libido, it’s time for some real talk with your partner. Work together to rekindle that connection and spice things up in the bedroom. With a little effort (and maybe some guidance), you can get your mojo back and start feeling like the sex goddess you are.
Be willing to challenge your own beliefs about intimacy looking/being a certain way. There are a lot of ways that one can experience intimacy and closeness. Taking a moment to explore your own beliefs around this can also help you break down walls that can lead to further closeness.
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