The 4 Core Types of Intimacy Explained (and Why Most Couples Miss Them)

Unpacking the Types of Intimacy: Rewriting Your Relationship’s Playbook

Emotional Intimacy and the Amygdala’s Role

Dr. Robin Buckley: When couples talk about their relationships, you know, this emotional part of the brain, the amygdala, is firing. I always describe the amygdala like a toddler on caffeine. But if you’re looking for something that involves intimacy, it takes time. A lot of times, what I’ve experienced is that couples who share very similar spiritual intimacies have stronger foundations because it’s that value system. It’s what grounds them as a couple. So it’s not a matter of, “Oh, it’s a threat, and we can’t do it.” It’s, “Okay, now how are we going to work around that?” It’s not possible to get everything from one person. So it’s okay to say, “Wow, my partner doesn’t quite give me everything I want in the area of emotional intimacy,” but there are times when the emotional intimacy is not as full as I want from him because he is very much driven by his rational brain, and sometimes I don’t want to be. So that’s when I call up my sister or my best friend because they will absolutely let me do whatever I want with my emotions. And that’s okay. It doesn’t mean he’s not the right partner for me. It doesn’t mean he’s cold by any means. It just means that I want something a little bit different or more.

Building a Strong Relationship Foundation

Dr. Robin Buckley: Ideally, I suggest to couples that, at the latest, they do a review. This is not something that you do once and never think about again. If you’re the founders of your relationship, how are you going to make sure that it sustains all the ups and downs that are going to come? Just like market values of a business, you get to decide how to do that with all the tools possible. When people talk about marriage or relationships being hard work, that is BS.

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Introduction: Sex, Intimacy, and Business Strategies in Relationships

Dr. Diane Mueller: Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of The Lounge. I’m your host, certified sexologist and libido expert, Dr. Diane, and I have a treat for you today. So I have with me Dr. Robin Buckley, and we are going to talk about so many things today. Some of them, we’re going to talk about sex versus intimacy. A lot of times, these conversations are confused, and I think so much of the time, we focus on one of the two in these conversations, and we forget that sex and intimacy are different, and we forget that they’re both important for the health and maintenance of a relationship. So we’re going to break that down, talk about strategies for both. And one of the things that I think is so cool about Dr. Robin’s methodology is taking business structure and business systems and applying that same methodology to relationships. I think this is so valuable because, as an entrepreneur and a business owner, what I’ve seen in business, I do apply to life, right? I apply it to conversations that I have about the stepkids. I apply it to things like scheduling time in my life and my day-to-day process for things like fantasy and pleasure and my partner and more. So I can see how this is so important. And we’re going to break down some of the nitty-gritty today and tell you how to get Dr. Robin’s book and so many more things. So thank you so much for joining me today, Dr. Robin. I’m so excited. This will be fun.

Dr. Robin Buckley: Same here.

Breaking Down the Types of Intimacy: Challenges and Opportunities

Dr. Diane Mueller: So much juiciness happening today, and let’s start big picture, right? So let’s start with this conversation of intimacy versus sex. Can you help just lay some foundational groundwork for how these things are different?

Dr. Robin Buckley: Intimacy is our connection to someone else, and it isn’t necessarily only involving sex. In fact, there are different types of intimacy. There’s emotional intimacy, there’s intellectual intimacy, there’s spiritual intimacy, and there’s experiential intimacy. I think for a lot of us, we forget. We just lump it under one category, and the term intimacy is used synonymously to mean sex. And these are not the same things. As you can tell from this list, it’s a lot more faceted than those two being interchangeable words. So intimacy, at least in my perspective—and maybe yours as well—is that it creates the foundation for the potential for a really healthy sexual life. It’s very challenging to have a healthy sex life without intimacy, at least in the couples that I’ve worked with. It’s possible, but it’s probably not a sex life that is sustainable.

Dr. Diane Mueller: I think there’s so much to be said there. I relate to all of that. I actually had a personal realization recently around, like, I get all my personal realizations when I’m snowboarding, and I was snowboarding a couple weeks ago, and so I was thinking about business frequently, and I was like, “Maybe I should really stop saying I’m a sex doc and start saying I’m an intimacy doc,” and it’s for exactly all those reasons because all of those things are the things I talk to people about. So I think defining that is so key, and one of the things in what you’re saying is, like, okay, well, can sex be as deep and as fulfilling? I think when people go and have more just, like, flings and one-night stands, there can be some level of fulfillment in that. Do you see, like, that is difficult in those scenarios to get into more, like, these other types of intimacy, which can lead to the depth of sex?

Dr. Robin Buckley: Absolutely. And I am not, you know, and as I perceive you are, I don’t judge. If people want to go out and just have random, fun, non-committal sex, as long as it’s safe and consensual, have at it. I have no issues with that. But if you’re looking for something that involves intimacy, it takes time. It takes time to know that person at that level because, very often, as strange as it might sound, intimacy is more vulnerable than sex for, I think, a good percentage of individuals because it’s really getting into the things that you value and how you identify in terms of as a person, as a being. So it takes a more extensive time than maybe the one-night stands or the sex just for fun. Again, each has its own place, and each has its own choices, but to really develop that sense of intimacy is going to then broaden the level of sexual connection to a much deeper level.

Dr. Diane Mueller: I really like when intimacy is broken down into “into me see,” right? And it’s, like, so, like, a great example, like, when we actually break it down and kind of make these side words out of the word of, like, what’s really happening there, but I’m like, yes, like you said, it’s more vulnerable. Somebody is, like, seeing all the stuff—the stuff that we might personally put a label, good versus bad, and, you know, maybe there’s shame and all those things.

Vulnerability and the Four Types of Intimacy

Dr. Diane Mueller: So let’s break this down even more, though. So you said with your perspective of intimacy, you named four different types. You named emotional, spiritual, sexual—what was the other one?

Dr. Robin Buckley: So there’s emotional intimacy, intellectual intimacy, spiritual intimacy, and experiential intimacy. So can we talk about those a little bit more and, like, more on what those are and how do people begin to cultivate those different types of intimacy with their partner?

Dr. Diane Mueller: Yeah, absolutely.

Dr. Robin Buckley: So when we’re looking at emotional intimacy, I think that might be the one that is easiest to understand. Emotional intimacy is that safe place and safe experience of sharing your emotions, your feelings, your perspectives on different things, and knowing that you won’t be judged in a negative way, that it is okay to not only share them but express them and have that connection. And again, I think that is one that a lot of people can understand. And keeping in mind that when we talk about intimacy, this isn’t reserved just for our romantic relationships. This is also within our friendships and having that emotional intimacy. And one more qualifier: you might only have some types of intimacy with certain people. I mean, in my ideal world, and when I talk with clients, it’s lovely if you can have all types of intimacy with your romantic partner, but sometimes that’s not possible. And I don’t think that means the relationship is bad or not going to work. It just means that maybe some social diversification is necessary. So you find that intimacy with someone else. And I mean that, you know, through a friendship or otherwise. So emotional intimacy is sharing and being vulnerable. Intellectual intimacy is more around the sharing of ideas and being able to have respectful debates with whoever it is that you want this intellectual intimacy with. And in the political climate of the United States, this was a big challenge for a lot of friendships, a lot of family members, and a lot of couples because there were differing sides and differing perspectives that really started to break apart some of the intimacy because people couldn’t share it with that level of respect. So that was really challenging, and I’m hopeful that that gets better for a lot of people. Spiritual intimacy—a lot of people hear this and they assume it’s around religion, and it is not. Spiritual intimacy is around your values and how you see the greater world, how you see your purpose in life, and being able to share that with a partner or with a friend. And ideally, sharing it so that maybe that person can support you in achieving that—not that they’re going to do it for you, but they can encourage you or they can keep you accountable if that’s what you’re looking for, or they can be that sounding board for you as you share kind of the greater ideas. A lot of times, what I’ve experienced is that couples who share very similar spiritual intimacies, they do have stronger foundations because it’s that value system. It’s what grounds them as a couple. And then experiential intimacy is—I don’t know, I laugh because I think it’s sometimes the most fun. It’s what are you sharing in a very, for lack of redundancy, experiential way with someone. You know, are you going on trips? Do you go running with them? Do you go paint pottery? It doesn’t matter what it is, but what are your shared experiences that bring you closer? Because it’s those memories that, again, kind of weave themselves into the foundation of that relationship, whether it’s a romantic relationship or whether it’s a friend relationship. So, as an example, in my family, our kids are all adult children now, but once a year, we take all of our kids and their significant others on some trip. So we don’t exchange holiday presents. This is their present. And we do a big family trip. So there is that connection, and we have those memories. And my kids, long before they were adults, they have that history of shared探索

System: shared experiences, sometimes good, sometimes bad, that keeps that experiential intimacy within our family unit.

Dr. Diane Mueller: I have so many questions going through my head, and, like, one of them—so this is great. I love this framework, right? Because one of the things I’m initially thinking about, listening to this, is, like, okay, these are all different areas from an intimacy standpoint. When we have our intimacy needs met, right, we can feel more supported, we can feel more alive, we can feel more excited about life—there are just so many things, right, that can come out of this. So what I’m curious about, and maybe this gets into your framework, is, is there a process then that you take people through to help identify, like, “Oh, okay, maybe I don’t have this spiritual, value-based connection with my partner, and maybe I need to get that through my friend.” Like, is there a process for helping people identify how they can get their needs met and with whom?

SWOT Analysis and Relationship Growth

Dr. Robin Buckley: Well, as objective as it sounds—because it is—with the couples I work with, we do a SWOT analysis. Okay, for those who aren’t familiar with that term, it’s a very business-based term, which looks at strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats. And it works in business because you can build off the strengths to address the weaknesses. Strengths can also help create some kind of foundation to deal with any potential threats, and then you can see opportunities. And what I always say to couples who are like, “I don’t know, Dr. Robin, can we really—like, that seems a little too businessy,” I said, “Well, if it works in business, why couldn’t it work in a relationship and towards intimacy?” That’s what we look at: how can we use the strengths in the relationship to enhance each level of intimacy? And in order to do that, it’s also identifying for each member of a couple, what does each type of intimacy look like for you? What are you sharing? You know, are you really strong in intellectual intimacy? How can we use that then to build spiritual intimacy if that’s lacking? So we look at it in terms of, where are the strengths in the couple, where are the challenges or the weaknesses, and then what are the opportunities to build on those, and are there any threats? As an example, sometimes—and I talked to a couple who has children—we talked about them as stakeholders, internal stakeholders that the couple is working to maintain, just like in business. And sometimes, internal stakeholders are threats to experiential intimacy as a couple because they are time-consuming and financially consuming. So it’s not a matter of, “Oh, it’s a threat, and we can’t do it.” It’s, “Okay, now how are we going to work around that?” So it’s a very analytical way of breaking down where are the strongest points in a relationship, where are the challenges, and how can we foresee to avoid anything that could continue to damage the relationship.

Dr. Diane Mueller: I love it. I love the SWOT analysis in general. And basically, I think I just, like, I’m a scientist by heart. So anytime we can find systematic ways of helping people, it just makes it so, I think, linear and obtainable.

Dr. Robin Buckley: Well, as you know, Diane, a lot of it goes back to just neuroscience. And when couples talk about their relationships, you know, this emotional part of the brain, the amygdala, is firing. And I always describe the—

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Engaging the Prefrontal Cortex and Diversifying Intimacy Sources

Dr. Robin Buckley: And if we don’t find a way to rein in the amygdala and get our logical part of our brain, the prefrontal cortex, engaged, then the amygdala is going to take over. And that’s where you see couples blow up, whether it’s in sadness or in anger. But when you’re looking at things strategically, whether it’s through SWOT analysis or otherwise, then your prefrontal cortex is there, and then you can talk about even really difficult things in a really calm way.

Dr. Diane Mueller: It’s interesting, right? We’re actually taking something that is highly emotional, like our emotional intimacy, to also be redundant. And we’re actually taking that and saying, “Oh, we’re going to actually take the emotion out of the emotional intimacy so we can process it, right?” So we can get emotional intimacy. It’s this very simple thing that works.

Dr. Robin Buckley: Yeah, I love that so much. So, you know, when do you typically find then in your work where you do something like this? So you’re doing a SWOT analysis on these four different intimacy areas. When do you find in your work then it’s like, “Oh, this is something that we’re not actually able to improve upon, right? There’s not the opportunity, it’s like we just can’t get to that opportunity to say, ‘Oh, like, we’re going to have this intellectual relationship,’ that’s just maybe not available.” Is that what happens then? Is it, like, then determining, like, because of something like that coming up, like, “Okay, you need to maybe find a way of getting this need met through a friendship or through a course”? Is that kind of how it works?

Dr. Robin Buckley: Yeah. For a lot of us in our society, you know, we’re raised on romcoms and Disney and Hallmark and these wonderful relationships created by fate and destiny. And I don’t buy into that one bit. And I think that’s what leads to disappointment for a lot of relationships. And we buy into the idea that our partner is the one person to give us everything. And whether you listen to Esther Perel or Brené Brown or any of these amazing theorists and researchers, this is just not possible. It’s not possible to get everything from one person. So it’s okay to say, “Wow, you know, my partner doesn’t quite give me everything I want in the area of emotional intimacy.” I do hope that your partner gives you some in each area, but it doesn’t have to be to the fullest extent. I adore my husband. I am very lucky to be best friends with my husband because we were best friends for 20 years before we were married. So it was an easy jump. But there are times when the emotional intimacy is not as full as I want from him because he is very much driven by his rational brain, and sometimes I don’t want to be. So that’s when I call up my sister or my best friend because they will absolutely let me do whatever I want with my emotions. And that’s okay. It doesn’t mean he’s not the right partner for me. It doesn’t mean he’s cold by any means. It just means that I want something a little bit different or more. And it’s great that I have other people so that it then doesn’t become, “Oh, he can’t do for me what I want,” and then it spins out of control. And I think, you know, just, like, recategorize it, going into things. It’s so much easier than to recognize, like, “Oh, right, this is that thing that’s happening where this need’s not being met.” And instead of making the partner bad, we just realize, like, “Oh, they’re showing up for them in the way they’re able to.” And now I recognize this, and now I can just call my sister, like you’re saying.

Dr. Diane Mueller: Exactly. Exactly. It gives the power back.

Intimacy Needs and the Value of Relationship Reviews

Dr. Diane Mueller: Now, do you apply anything more from the sexual side of things to business or at all? Or is it more just in these other types of intimacy categories?

Dr. Robin Buckley: There’s no area of relationship that escapes this frame. One of the biggest areas, or easiest strategies, is, you know, we talk in business about annual reviews, and every year a person gets to review with someone that is involved in their development, how they’re doing. Now, I do not recommend that couples do an annual review because that’s too long to wait. Ideally, I suggest to couples that, at the latest, they do a quarterly review, but I love monthly reviews, and it looks very much like an annual review where there is an agenda, and there are topics to cover, not only new topics that have come up but consistent topics, and sexual life or intimacy is one of those steady agenda items each month or each quarter if it has to be extended out. And it’s a conversation of what is working and a little bit of a SWOT analysis: What’s not working? What techniques have we tried that we want to keep trying? What techniques really didn’t work? But it gives a spot for couples to have the conversation because a lot of times, you know, you’re walking past each other in the kitchen, “How was your day?” “Good.” “How was your day?” “Good.” And that’s all you’re getting. And that’s not going to enhance any level of intimacy and certainly not going to roll over to enhancing sexual wellness. So when you actually know that’s going to be on the agenda, it gives you the opportunity because a lot of times—I don’t know about you, Diane—but when people are in bed with their partners, that isn’t necessarily the time they want to have these dragged-out conversations. It either detracts from what they’re trying to accomplish, whatever that might be, or it becomes emotional because they’re in that vulnerable space, and then it feels like criticism or disappointment instead of, “Hey, we’re sitting in our home office, or we’re sitting at the dining room table, the kids are out of the shot, and I can just say, you know what, remember that two weeks ago? That didn’t really feel very good, and I’d like to process how we can work around that.” Again, couples sometimes pull back because they think it sounds way too sterile. But then again, if you can have those kinds of conversations about really important emotional topics and lead to a solution, that’s what makes it better.

Dr. Diane Mueller: It’s amazing. And I’ve seen that too in my work, that the bed is not often the place to have these kinds of conversations. Like, it’s like we have memories, and if it doesn’t go as well as you want or there’s a moment of intensity, the next time you do want to go and just be sexy and intimate and have your moment, then sometimes those memories come flooding back.

Dr. Robin Buckley: Exactly. It’s like, it can create a very real, like, PTSD-almost trauma-type response in certain situations.

Dr. Diane Mueller: Right. It is amazing when you see how the connections are. You know, you have these objective conversations, these rational, data-based, fact-based conversations—it enhances intimacy at sometimes multiple levels, which then can enhance your sex life. And to me, you know, I can’t speak for everyone, that’s the ideal, like, I can get all of it by just using all the pieces instead of, “We’re just going to use one piece and hope it ripples out,” because that isn’t typically how things are done in personal life and definitely not in business.

Dr. Robin Buckley: No, not in business. And not in medicine either. Like, people are looking for, like, one root cause. I’m like, “Well, maybe strep throat, but there’s—”

Dr. Diane Mueller: You know, you look at, like, low libido, for example. And it’s like, yeah, it could be testosterone, but it’s usually testosterone and circulation and neurological and emotional and on and on and on and on and on. It’s, like, there’s not one cause here.

Dr. Robin Buckley: No. And you’re going to use all the tools. You’re going to go see a physician. You’re also maybe going to go see a therapist or a counselor or coach. And then maybe you’re also going to take medication. You’re going to use all the tools available. So when I work with couples, you know, I say, you don’t rule out anything. Why wouldn’t you want to use everything at your disposal to get what you really want or at least really close to it?

Rational Discussions and Business Frameworks for Relationship Enhancement

Dr. Diane Mueller: Yeah, I love it. So we talked about SWOT analysis. We talked about our monthly reviews. What other business—and I know we’re going to encourage people, obviously, to go get your book, which will have way more in it than we can get to today—but can you give us another example of a business-type framework that you’ve seen really apply to intimacy and sex?

Dr. Robin Buckley: Really, really simple one. I ask all my couples from the very first session, “Tell me what you understand of what a mission statement is.” And they can rattle off all their companies, and their small businesses have mission statements, and they’re all full of themselves because they know what it is, the benefits are. And I said, “Okay, cool. So what’s your relationship mission statement?” And then I get deer in the headlights or just crickets in the background. They’re like, “Oh, well, no, that’s not the same.” I’m like, “It is. All the benefits you talked about—you know, keeping everybody unified under one goal and having a direction for the company and shared values and articulation of that—are all what a business can do. But why wouldn’t you want the same things in your relationship?” So couples will work on developing a mission statement, and then sometimes, as we progress, I will actually have them create a second mission statement, which is just about their sex life. So they create a sexual mission statement that is specific to that area of their life because sometimes that needs a more developed nuance than just their overall relationship mission statement. And it becomes a tool. I tell them, this is not something that you do once and you never think about again. Again, as your monthly review, you review your mission statement: What are some ways we supported our mission statement this month? What are some ways we were totally off track? And the same with the sexual mission statement: How did we support it? And how did we miss the mark, and how can we change that? It becomes a way, an evaluation tool, for all the important areas—the big umbrella of the relationship and that really specific, important part for a lot of people around intimacy and sex.

Dr. Diane Mueller: I love it. And I was about to even comment before you said it, the monthly review, because my partner and I actually did this. We created a couple mission statement.

Dr. Robin Buckley: Oh, I love this.

Dr. Diane Mueller: But here’s the thing: as you were saying this, I’m like, I immediately was like, “But can I actually tell her what it is?” Because we’ve not been doing the review, and I know that, like, I do that for my business. I do monthly reviews and quarterly reviews and yearly reviews and all the things. But it’s, like, this is a perfect example of, like, we created it, and now I need to talk to him tonight and be like, “Do you remember what that was?” And we probably need to update it because it’s been some years.

Dr. Robin Buckley: Right. Exactly. But that’s a really—you know, it’s this dynamic, ever-evolving thing. It isn’t just you slap it on paper, and then it’s good forever. That’s crazy. Your relationship, I would hope, isn’t like that. It’s going to continue to evolve and change as each of you do. So, yeah.

Mission Statements and Team Dynamics in Relationships

Dr. Diane Mueller: And I think it’s so, like, I talk a lot too about, like, putting people, like, in couples, like, putting each other on the same team again, right? And I think so many times it’s, like, we get in these little things, right? These little spats or these little moments that drift us apart, and it’s so easy to forget that, “Hey, this is, like, you know, this is, like, teammate. This is, like, being on the same team.” And I think that mission statement is a good way—it’s one of many tools that really can help to put people back on, like, “Oh, this is why we’re together. This is what we’re doing. We’re on the pink team. This is what our team is about. This is what we stand for.”

Dr. Robin Buckley: When you think about it, you know, if—and again, we’re talking in more of a traditional sense of a two-partner relationship. And I know there’s lots of different ways a relationship can look, but when you, if it were going from that framework, you know, those two people are the founders of the relationship, just like co-founders of a business would be working together. So if you’re the founders of your relationship, how are you going to make sure that it sustains all the ups and downs that are going to come, just like market values of a business, and you get to decide how to do that with all the tools possible.

Dr. Diane Mueller: It’s so good. Like, so good. And I do like the sexual mission statement too. Like, I’m also thinking, like, we’ve kind of defined what our sex goals are, meaning, like, frequency and things we want to try and those kinds of things, but we haven’t defined it from a mission statement standpoint. So I love—you’re giving me some fun ideas for our conversation after we celebrate life with kids later.

Dr. Robin Buckley: Love to get it. So good.

CBT Framework and Dr. Robin Buckley’s Insights

Dr. Diane Mueller: So, wrapping up part one here, and then we’ll let everybody know that, hey, you can get part two by going to mylibidodoc.com. And in part two, we’re going to talk about the CBT framework, cognitive behavioral therapy, and, like, some of the framework with that. Like, my understanding of CBT has always been, like, part of the process with that is to get trauma and things that are more intense or maybe more activating to the nervous system more into the prefrontal cortex where we can process them and actually have conversations. Is that really what we’re doing here?

Dr. Robin Buckley: Yeah. It’s actually applying deliberate strategies so that your brain becomes your ally in the relationship rather than your adversary. And that’s as simple as I can make it.

Dr. Diane Mueller: And so we’re going to talk about that in part two. And I think that’s so important because a lot of times it’s, like, the crazy thought that gets to the brain, and we believe that thought, and the thought then creates all these feelings, and it takes over. And all of a sudden, we’re making these decisions about our life and our relationship just because we had a thought go by our brain, and we didn’t even have to believe it.

Dr. Robin Buckley: Yeah.

Complimentary Coaching Session and Final Thoughts

Dr. Diane Mueller: Okay, so part two coming up. Before that, let’s tell everybody about your book that’s coming out, how to access that, how to access, you know, just all your goodies, right?

Dr. Robin Buckley: So, by the summer of 2025, my book, entitled Marriage Incorporated: Building a Relationship with a Business Framework, is going to be out, and it talks about some of the strategies that we’ve talked about today, Diane, as well as a whole host of others. So it’s based on over 15 years of using this framework and really seeing it work in a way that, for some couples who have tried even traditional therapy, just didn’t have the success. So that’s going to be out. And if you have any questions about it, you can find me on Instagram, LinkedIn, or at my website, drrobbuckley.com.

Dr. Diane Mueller: And we’ll have all of those links in the show notes. And then you had some other giveaway too, is that right?

Dr. Robin Buckley: Yeah, absolutely. So when people reach out, we can absolutely schedule a complimentary 15-minute coaching session. It’s usually just something where I can really help very quickly identify some key goals that people want to accomplish and give them a couple of quick strategies. So it’s just a way to really jumpstart your relationship.

Dr. Diane Mueller: Perfect. Great gifts. And we’ll find all that in the show notes. And before we wrap up today, is there any final thing you want to say to everybody before we call it a wrap?

Dr. Robin Buckley: Yeah, I would say that when people talk about marriage or relationships being hard work, that is BS. It is not hard work. It is diligence, nurturement, and dedication to the relationship every single day. But if you tell your brain it’s hard work—and we’ll be talking about this next—it will be. So stop telling yourself that and just apply the tools that will get you the relationship you want.

Dr. Diane Mueller: I love that so much. I get very frustrated when people say the same thing. So we’re totally in alignment there. So everybody, I hope you will go check out this book. This will be out basically any day now. And please go check out more of Robin’s work and find me at mylibidodoc.com for part two. Thank you so much, Robin, for being here today.

Dr. Robin Buckley: Thank you, Diane. This was awesome.

Dr. Diane Mueller: Alright, everybody, this is another episode of The Lounge. Can’t wait to see you again. Thank you for listening to The Libido Lounge. Please don’t keep me a secret. Please share this with your friends. You can find me on YouTube, on Instagram, and check out our Modern Libido Club for so much more!