Vaginal Pain Ruining Your Life? Discover the Slow Pleasure Solution!

My Libido Doc Episode: Unlocking Pleasure Through Vaginal Pain

Dr. Diane Mueller: Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of My Libido Doc! Today, we’re diving into a raw, real conversation about vaginal pain, disconnection, and how to reclaim pleasure as your birthright. I’m thrilled to introduce our guest, Courtney Davis, a sexual wellness entrepreneur who’s shaking up how we connect with our bodies. This episode is for women navigating libido challenges, shame, or numbness—especially in midlife relationships—and for partners who want to understand how to support them. Let’s get started!

Meet Courtney Davis: Pioneer of Slow Pleasure

Dr. Diane Mueller: I’m so excited to have Courtney Davis with us today. This show is especially for women, but male partners, you’ll learn a lot about pleasing the women in your life too. Courtney, you’re a pioneer of the slow pleasure movement and the creator of incredible products like WAANDS™ Crystal Pleasure Wands and Free Bleed® Waterproof Blankets. We’re going to talk about how these tools help women release stored emotions and rediscover pleasure. But first, tell us—how did you get into this unique work of supporting women’s sexual wellness?

Courtney Davis: If I reflect back to my teenage years, there was this drive to explore my own sexuality and pleasure, to feel sexually empowered. Initially, that looked like what the media showed me—think Samantha Jones from Sex and the City. I was all about vibrators, even gifting them to my girlfriends, advocating for our right to pleasure. But in my early 20s, through workshops and alternative practices during my travels, I had a big awakening. I realized my pursuit of sexual empowerment was actually disconnecting me from my body. That’s when I started creating products like the crystal pleasure wands to support a slower, more intentional connection.

Why Vaginal Pain Signals Deeper Disconnection

Dr. Diane Mueller: You’ve hit on something so important—disconnection. Vaginal pain, numbness, or dissociation often stems from emotions stored in the vagina, cervix, or clitoris. Women aren’t taught how to process this, which can make sex painful or unfulfilling. What do you think causes this disconnection from our own anatomy, and how can women recognize it’s happening?

Courtney Davis: It starts with our fast-paced society. We’re rarely present, always chasing the next goal instead of listening to our bodies. We’ve internalized unhelpful ideas about sex from media—like porn or movies—that set unrealistic expectations for how our bodies should respond. This masculine portrayal of female sexuality disconnects us from our true desires. Women might notice they’re disconnected when they feel numb, lack natural lubrication despite being young, or experience vaginal pain. Sometimes, it’s subtler—a sense of unfulfillment or exhaustion that signals you’re not in your body.

Dr. Diane Mueller: I love how you frame that. For me, signs of disconnection show up as a wandering mind, snappiness, or ending every day saying, “I’m so exhausted.” It’s like a cue to check in with my body. How do women start noticing these signs before they escalate to severe vaginal pain or burnout?

Courtney Davis: Unfortunately, it often takes intense symptoms like vaginal pain, pelvic pain, or extreme burnout to force us to look deeper. Subtler signs, like trouble with natural lubrication at a young age, might get dismissed as stress or hormones. But for those sensitive to it, a lack of sexual fulfillment can spark curiosity to investigate sooner. It’s about pausing to ask, “What’s my body telling me?”

Dearmoring: Releasing Stored Emotions in the Pelvis

Dr. Diane Mueller: Let’s talk about dearmoring, a term some listeners might not know. As a naturopathic doctor, I see parallels between vaginal pain and physical patterns elsewhere, like TMJ or jaw clenching, which mirrors tension in the pelvis. Can you explain dearmoring and how it helps release stored emotions?

Courtney Davis: Dearmoring is about releasing the “armor” our tissues build to protect us, often holding unprocessed emotions, memories, or trauma, especially in erogenous zones. It involves hands-on, intentional work—physically, emotionally, and energetically—to let those tissues release what’s stagnant, easing pain or numbness. It’s not a medical term, but more women are discovering it by connecting with their bodies.